Take the hits

The link I posted last night is a speech I have watched 450 thousand times in my life.  I have posted it on every blog I have ever written.  I post it to remind myself to stop before getting upset and keep things in perspective.  I had something pretty shitty happen over the last couple days.  It’s not the end of the world in the grand scheme of things, but its just one more thing to add to the pile.  I was starting to feel down on myself, and I went to this video to get some perspective as I have done often.

One of my passions is poker.  I love the game.  I, like anyone else who has played any significant amount of hands over their life have taken some “bad beats”.  The thing about bad beats is, yes sometimes it was a play you made earlier in the hand, that led to this “bad beat”.  You didn’t charge your opponent the right price to draw out on you or whatever.  You let them get there, by not making a better play earlier in the hand, leading to your “bad luck”.  This is applicable in life as well.  Although at first glance the thing that happened wasn’t really my fault, it could have been avoided if I would have handled things differently earlier.  I could have avoided this all together. 

Meh….being vague I know, but its not something I am going to put out there right now.  Guess I am writing this more for myself and to get the idea in grained in my head, that shitty result yes, but there is always another hand.  Just keep making good decisions and eventually, things will turn out as they should. 

Still in limbo

Well, for the last couple months I have been doing a tonne of thinking about things in my life. Is it turning 35 and being layed up for 3-4 months with health issues? I dunno. I have hinted about it or talked about it directly in past blogs but I just have this feeling I need to make some changes in my life. Clearly I think/internalize things alot, arguably too much. For the past several months I have been thinking about a lot of stuff, but I will hit the highlites below:

-Do I spend too much time (playing/discussing/thinking/studying etc) about poker?

-Time to get control of my health. Feeling like hell most of the time is no way to go about living.

-Do I want to leave the net completely, centralize all my various writing or what?

-What do I want to do career wise. I am currently training for a new position, but do i want to stay in this industry? Do I want to do something for myself (preferably). What would that be? Start some sort of photography business?

I just find that I have been spinning my wheels for quite a while now. I just feel like I should be doing more. Putting my focus elsewhere. Life is too short to spend it haphazardly. I dunno. I just feel kinda in limbo right now, but can’t quite put my finger on it.

I guess I will just continue writing here in my blog, as I do it as a form of release, and altho a handful of my friends may read this or even know about this blog, I do it mostly for me. I do tend to write every single day, but what actually ends up here can come in bunches, or this blog can go post free for weeks at a time. For any of you that are reading this I am messing around as I often do on a few websites so check them out. Our poker site www.nevertilt.com is looking real good thanks to my buddy Josh doing most of the work, and with me getting the forums up and running. Also I am in the beginning stages of messing around with my own personal site at www.shaneleighton.net. Right now that points to a forum, and altho the forums will stay there, this URL may eventually lead to a different front page. But if you are reading this feel free to go to the site and join the forums and contribute in any way you see fit!

Still in limbo

Well, for the last couple months I have been doing a tonne of thinking about things in my life. Is it turning 35 and being layed up for 3-4 months with health issues? I dunno. I have hinted about it or talked about it directly in past blogs but I just have this feeling I need to make some changes in my life. Clearly I think/internalize things alot, arguably too much. For the past several months I have been thinking about a lot of stuff, but I will hit the highlites below:

-Do I spend too much time (playing/discussing/thinking/studying etc) about poker?

-Time to get control of my health. Feeling like hell most of the time is no way to go about living.

-Do I want to leave the net completely, centralize all my various writing or what?

-What do I want to do career wise. I am currently training for a new position, but do i want to stay in this industry? Do I want to do something for myself (preferably). What would that be? Start some sort of photography business?

I just find that I have been spinning my wheels for quite a while now. I just feel like I should be doing more. Putting my focus elsewhere. Life is too short to spend it haphazardly. I dunno. I just feel kinda in limbo right now, but can’t quite put my finger on it.

I guess I will just continue writing here in my blog, as I do it as a form of release, and altho a handful of my friends may read this or even know about this blog, I do it mostly for me. I do tend to write every single day, but what actually ends up here can come in bunches, or this blog can go post free for weeks at a time. For any of you that are reading this I am messing around as I often do on a few websites so check them out. Our poker site www.nevertilt.com is looking real good thanks to my buddy Josh doing most of the work, and with me getting the forums up and running. Also I am in the beginning stages of messing around with my own personal site at www.shaneleighton.net. Right now that points to a forum, and altho the forums will stay there, this URL may eventually lead to a different front page. But if you are reading this feel free to go to the site and join the forums and contribute in any way you see fit!

Ch-Ch-Changes

One of my favorite bloggers out there is Dr Pauly of tao of Pauly, and Tao of poker. I have been reading his blogs for about 4 or 5 years now, stumbling upon his tao of pauly blog before he started the poker blog. As I have often said, and as should be obvious by my many blogs here on blogger, I am somewhat of a blog fan, lol. Well in reality I am a huge fan of writing and reading. I am always reading. Be it magazines, books, or on the internet. I love good writing on any subject and it just so happens Dr. Pauly is one of the best writers out there on poker, one of my passions.

Yesterday he posted that he may be leaving the poker industry. He is burnt out by the countless hours of traveling and time spent following the tourney circuit all over the world. This does not come as a surprise to me as he has been hinting at it for a year and a half or more, and I for one would hate to see him go.

However, the current post in question, by Dr Pauly reminds me a little of what has been going through my head the past few months. It is no secret that the office life is not my thing. It is not the main contributor to my health issues, but at the same time the lack of movement and the constant sitting does not help it. I spent about 1800 hours of overtime on top of my 40 hour weeks over the past few years and I have all but decides unless under extreme circumstances, I have worked my last hour of overtime sitting on my butt in an office setting.

Pauly is considering leaving poker to live his life on his terms. He left wallstreet for the unsecure life of a writer, and now he is contemplating another move to live his life more on his terms. In my life I have been thinking for quite a while now, what do I really want to do with myself? I am not getting any younger having just turned 35. Do I want to sit in an office for the next 30 years? No frigging way. What are my choices? What do I really want to do to support myself?

I have a few ideas. One and the most likely is to start some sort of business in photography. It is a lifelong passion of mine, and something that can be started part time, until you have enough work to take it full time. But like poker for Pauly, once your hobby becomes your job, are you dooming yourself to resent it? I don’t know. I just know that I can’t sit in an office for another 30 years inactive. It’s not good for my health. And it’s time I make some decisions that are best for myself, my family and my health in the long run. Got a lot to think about

Ch-Ch-Changes

One of my favorite bloggers out there is Dr Pauly of tao of Pauly, and Tao of poker. I have been reading his blogs for about 4 or 5 years now, stumbling upon his tao of pauly blog before he started the poker blog. As I have often said, and as should be obvious by my many blogs here on blogger, I am somewhat of a blog fan, lol. Well in reality I am a huge fan of writing and reading. I am always reading. Be it magazines, books, or on the internet. I love good writing on any subject and it just so happens Dr. Pauly is one of the best writers out there on poker, one of my passions.

Yesterday he posted that he may be leaving the poker industry. He is burnt out by the countless hours of traveling and time spent following the tourney circuit all over the world. This does not come as a surprise to me as he has been hinting at it for a year and a half or more, and I for one would hate to see him go.

However, the current post in question, by Dr Pauly reminds me a little of what has been going through my head the past few months. It is no secret that the office life is not my thing. It is not the main contributor to my health issues, but at the same time the lack of movement and the constant sitting does not help it. I spent about 1800 hours of overtime on top of my 40 hour weeks over the past few years and I have all but decides unless under extreme circumstances, I have worked my last hour of overtime sitting on my butt in an office setting.

Pauly is considering leaving poker to live his life on his terms. He left wallstreet for the unsecure life of a writer, and now he is contemplating another move to live his life more on his terms. In my life I have been thinking for quite a while now, what do I really want to do with myself? I am not getting any younger having just turned 35. Do I want to sit in an office for the next 30 years? No frigging way. What are my choices? What do I really want to do to support myself?

I have a few ideas. One and the most likely is to start some sort of business in photography. It is a lifelong passion of mine, and something that can be started part time, until you have enough work to take it full time. But like poker for Pauly, once your hobby becomes your job, are you dooming yourself to resent it? I don’t know. I just know that I can’t sit in an office for another 30 years inactive. It’s not good for my health. And it’s time I make some decisions that are best for myself, my family and my health in the long run. Got a lot to think about

Bah….Act II

So this morning I had physio so I needed to take my youngest daughter to school and take my sister to work in order to have the car to go to physio. It is pouring down rain today, I mean crazy rain, crazy wind, to add some ambiance to the morning.

So I take them to where they needed to go and was thinking about going to get a coffee, but I thought I would stop home first to get my phone which I had forgotten. So i get out of the car into the pouring rain, run up the steps and go to unlock the door. Insert the key, turn in, and all the sudden the key spins, to no resistance. Are you kidding me? Try again, the lock is broke. Weeeee. I don’t have keys to the back door on this ring of keys. Lovely.

So I run around back to make sure I locked the door which I had. Fantastic. Back out to the car. I get into the car and I am drenched, as if I showered with my clothes on. I don’t have the cell phone so i must find a pay phone. I go to the local gas station. Oh good. No money. Thankfully I have a calling card. So I call the boss on her cell. No answer. Call once. Twice. Three times. Weeeee.

Eventually I go to the wife’s work and get the keys for the back door, which she only had by luck as she almost didn’t bring them. I get in the house. We’re going to have to change the locks. Not that big a deal.

Later this am, not a bad luck thing, kinda funny actually. A gov’t looking car pulls up to the house. They are looking at the house, and park out front. A woman gets out of the car after a few minutes, and comes up to the house, I open the front door and she walks right in. She has longest hair down over her ears, so I don’t notice at first she is on a bluetooth cell phone. I ask her who she is and she puts her hands up to her lips in a “SHHHHHH” motion.

I gather from the side of the conversation I can hear she is a doctor or a nurse or some kind of health care person. I am thinking, what the hell? Is something wrong with one of the kids? what the hell is going on.

She gets off the phone and says “I’m sorry I am late, I have been dealing with this for 2 weeks.” I said, “Ahhhh, who are you?”. “Bev? From intermural health care”. I just stare at her. “OMG, don’t tell me I am in the wrong house” she continues “This isn’t ABC” I said “yes it is” then she looks at her paper “omg is CBA. ” embarassed she headed back off into the rain. Of course given my luck, i expected the worst and thought something had happened to the kids or something. Ahh well.

Bah….Act II

So this morning I had physio so I needed to take my youngest daughter to school and take my sister to work in order to have the car to go to physio. It is pouring down rain today, I mean crazy rain, crazy wind, to add some ambiance to the morning.

So I take them to where they needed to go and was thinking about going to get a coffee, but I thought I would stop home first to get my phone which I had forgotten. So i get out of the car into the pouring rain, run up the steps and go to unlock the door. Insert the key, turn in, and all the sudden the key spins, to no resistance. Are you kidding me? Try again, the lock is broke. Weeeee. I don’t have keys to the back door on this ring of keys. Lovely.

So I run around back to make sure I locked the door which I had. Fantastic. Back out to the car. I get into the car and I am drenched, as if I showered with my clothes on. I don’t have the cell phone so i must find a pay phone. I go to the local gas station. Oh good. No money. Thankfully I have a calling card. So I call the boss on her cell. No answer. Call once. Twice. Three times. Weeeee.

Eventually I go to the wife’s work and get the keys for the back door, which she only had by luck as she almost didn’t bring them. I get in the house. We’re going to have to change the locks. Not that big a deal.

Later this am, not a bad luck thing, kinda funny actually. A gov’t looking car pulls up to the house. They are looking at the house, and park out front. A woman gets out of the car after a few minutes, and comes up to the house, I open the front door and she walks right in. She has longest hair down over her ears, so I don’t notice at first she is on a bluetooth cell phone. I ask her who she is and she puts her hands up to her lips in a “SHHHHHH” motion.

I gather from the side of the conversation I can hear she is a doctor or a nurse or some kind of health care person. I am thinking, what the hell? Is something wrong with one of the kids? what the hell is going on.

She gets off the phone and says “I’m sorry I am late, I have been dealing with this for 2 weeks.” I said, “Ahhhh, who are you?”. “Bev? From intermural health care”. I just stare at her. “OMG, don’t tell me I am in the wrong house” she continues “This isn’t ABC” I said “yes it is” then she looks at her paper “omg is CBA. ” embarassed she headed back off into the rain. Of course given my luck, i expected the worst and thought something had happened to the kids or something. Ahh well.

Bah

So today my daughter comes in the house and said her pants are filthy and she needs to soak them. I tell her to put them in the bathroom sink, and didn’t think anything of it. Fast forward to an hour and a half later. I go into the kitchen to make supper. Socks are soaked. What the? Thats right bathroom sink running for an hour and a half.

I go downstairs to get a mop, the water is coming thru the floor/roof. Weeeeee. Run back upstairs and start mopping. Frig this, I need the shop vac. Back downstairs to grab it. Come up stairs start vacuuming, queue sore back. Oh it gets better.

Clean it all up, start supper and am bringing the shop vac back downstairs. go to pick it up, off comes the cover, this time in the kitchen. The shopvac empties.

This was my Thursday. Least we may be getting Stray rod back in Yankee Blue.

Bah

Bah

So today my daughter comes in the house and said her pants are filthy and she needs to soak them. I tell her to put them in the bathroom sink, and didn’t think anything of it. Fast forward to an hour and a half later. I go into the kitchen to make supper. Socks are soaked. What the? Thats right bathroom sink running for an hour and a half.

I go downstairs to get a mop, the water is coming thru the floor/roof. Weeeeee. Run back upstairs and start mopping. Frig this, I need the shop vac. Back downstairs to grab it. Come up stairs start vacuuming, queue sore back. Oh it gets better.

Clean it all up, start supper and am bringing the shop vac back downstairs. go to pick it up, off comes the cover, this time in the kitchen. The shopvac empties.

This was my Thursday. Least we may be getting Stray rod back in Yankee Blue.

Bah